Torla Santos

It came at the most unexpected time, like heavy rain on a sunny day. Just when everything is all set suddenly something unthinkable happens. The worst part is I am left powerless, unable to do something about it.  I sat in my chair wondering about it, a Friday evening with a missing wallet plus an early morning trip to the province the following day. The network monitor is going haywire, the first since I entered this job. Funny how your surroundings seem to be the one to mourning for your lost. Damn.

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Atin Cu Pong Ating

Computer

When I was a kid all I wanted was a computer, now all I want is to have my life back. I have become overly dependent on the internet, whether at work or at home and even at play! While others can’t live without a cell phone, I can’t live without a computer connected to the internet. I could have lived my childhood dream of becoming an artist, wielding the brush against the canvass, creating masterpieces, delighting the sense of sight and stimulating the mind. I could have lived my childhood dream of becoming a musician, spindling words against notes subtle enough to send you in a trance, yet loud enough to wake the hardened conscience – let it be. Having the excuse to act weird, and get away with it is too much of a consolation.

It is not in my nature to be technical; I am always inclined at the creative side, appreciating what is over the hood before looking what’s under the hood. I admire people who can be both technical and artistic at the same time. It is a rare gift. I’m from Pampanga and I studied in UST, and people from both parties are funned of making gigantic Christmas Trees during the Holidays, so let’s take the giant Christmas Tree building project as an example. Let’s say Thomasians are the purely artistic group and the Kapampangans are the purely technical group. If a group of Thomasians were to build a giant Christmas tree, it would collapse against the slightest Brisa, making the football field look like Kuya Germ’s dance floor without the confetti. I’m sure the rector would go berserk without the confetti. Looking at the Kapampangan’s Christmas tree, it is sturdy and well structured, only it looks like an oversized pine tree from Baguio.

What have we learned here today? None!

Coffee and Visa

Instead of logging into GG Client, I opted to open a blank document and write something nice. I also thought about watching the movies I downloaded over the weekend, my new internet provider allows me to download a lot of content because of insane download speeds. I should be thankful for that, I suppose. I am looking at the clock with heavy feeling, just a few hours before bedtime and another few hours before I lock myself in a building. And instead of writing something nice for my friends (you, the readers), I fear that I am about to whine.  For the past four months, my life has become another routine indulging in daily chores and a playground for self centered co-workers. I realized that you can land on so many jobs, but they are all the same – dream jobs don’t exist, at least for me. Simply after the first day fervor on your hot new job, you meet people who think the world revolves around them. Not long after, you go into the midway saturation. And finally when you grow tired of being nice (ass-kissing) you experience the last day burn out. The ill feelings miraculously fade once you submit that resignation letter. And yes, it always does.

Is it just me?

Technically, I am in my sixth job after graduating college four years ago. Subtracting one whole year I spent pursuing IT training, gives me a lifespan of staying less than six months per job. If you see wrong or find it improper, I don’t blame you because I always get a raised eyebrow plus stink eye during an interview. It is also the reason why I got denied by Uncle Sam a visa. During the interview, which probably was the worst two minutes of my life, I felt like breaking the glass and grabbing him by the collar, pulling his fat American ass up the divider. At least in the casino you can enjoy before losing your money, but in the US Embassy you have to wake up early, wait in line for hours before someone tells you “I can’t give you a visa.” To all power tripping consuls out there,  “putang ina nyo!” That day, I lost all my interest in going to the states. I opted not to attend my sister’s graduation the following year, even if it was a sure visa on my part.  That’s why I don’t drink coffee often, it leaves my throat dry.